I Want to Check You for Ticks

Sasquatch // May 11 // 0 Comments

Sasquatch is Anti-Social . . . But Sharing is Caring

The ticks out in the woods this year have been really bad. I pick them off of the dogs constantly. I’ve even had to remove one tick from Jennie this year.

While we were putting the kids to bed, Jennie mentioned that they all had weird bug bites. It dawned on me that my right butt cheek had started to itch. I wondered if I too had the weird bug bites; so I went to the bathroom to investigate.

I returned laughing. Jennie is disgusted by ticks and the last thing she wants to do is pull one out of my butt. But she said “till death do us part” . . . sucker.

The tick removal situation was definitely Liz Level Communications worthy. However, when I went to hit send on the text, my texting service prompted me with the following:

Blacklist

The text I wanted to leave y’all with before bed was as follows:

The ticks have been really bad this year.

So bad Jennie just had to remove a tick from my right butt cheek.

We both lost it when she said,

“I hate to say this, but I’m gonna need you to bend over.”

And I thought conservative Christians like myself were supposed to be the prudes.

I leave you with one of the greatest country love songs of all time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tiPndMqxLQ

About Sasquatch

Sasquatch (aka Kevin M. Anderson) is a Swineherd Philosopher Theologian, Esq. He is the head swineherd raising pigs and engaging in shenanigans at Sasquatch Wallows, a director of his local Classical Conversations Challenge B program, a commissioned Colson Fellow, and a criminal defense lawyer at Prodigal Law.